Saturday, April 28, 2007

Give it a thought!

Came across this one in a mail in office... nice one to share with all

The Woman in your life!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here is a girl, who is as much educated as you are;
Who is earning almost as much as you do;
One, who has dreams and aspirations just as you have because she is as human as you are;
One, who has never entered the kitchen in her life just like you or your Sister haven't,
as she was busy in studies and competing in a system that
Gives no special concession to girls for their culinary achievements
One, who has lived and loved her parents & brothers & sisters, almost as,
Much as you do for 20-25 years of her life;
One, who has bravely agreed to leave behind all that, her home, people who,
Love her, to adopt your home, your family, your ways and even your family Name

One, who is somehow expected to be a master-chef from day #1,
while you sleep oblivious to her predicament in her new circumstances, environment and that kitchen
One, who is expected to make the tea, first thing in the morning and cook food at the end of the day, even if she is as tired as you are, maybe more, and yet never ever expected to complain;
to be a servant, a cook, a mother, a wife, even if she doesn't want to;
and is learning just like you are as to what you want from her;

and is clumsy and sloppy at times and knows that you won't like it if she is too demanding, or if she learns faster than you;
One, who has her own set of friends, and that includes boys and even men at her workplace too, those, who she knows from school days and yet is willing to put all that on the back-burners to avoid your irrational jealousy,
Unnecessary competition and your inherent insecurities;
Yes, she can drink and dance just as well as you can, but won't, simply
Because you won't like it, even though you say otherwise
One, who can be late from work once in a while when deadlines, just like Yours are to be met;
One, who is doing her level best and wants to make this most important Relationship in her entire life a grand success, if you just help her some And trust her;
One, who just wants one thing from you, as you are the only one she knows in your entire house - your unstinted support, your sensitivities and most importantly - your understanding, or love, if you may call it.
But not many guys understand this...
Well... Give it a thought now!!

7 comments:

samurai said...

hi shagufta,it makes the point about the feelings of women and their growing ambitions.but i feel it has a slightly unfair tilt in presuming that men cant be anything but understanding.

Shagufta said...

Samurai, many men aren't understanding. Maybe Chennai culture is different. Or maybe u're more understanding. Its just a point. I've seen married women struggling and juggling between jobs and homes. Even cooking when they reach home tired at 10 pm! While their men do nothing but wait and grumble!

Sam said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sam said...

so what? mens r not made to work at homes!!!!!! they r made to enjoy the life unlike u? what is the use if u go for a job and make only 2000 Rs. per mnth. U r made for home and ur husband not for the whole world. If u make 20000 Rs. then toooo no use of that money as u will never get respect in the MUSLIM CULTURE. if understand my words plz stop publishing these things non useful words and want to reply me- email me here shanu2eye@gmail.com

Shagufta said...

Hey mean Sam, what do you mean I will not get respect in Muslim culture? I am a Bank Manager and doing well for myself and living with respect. If going half naked around means respect according you, then go fly a kite.

As for men not being made for work, prophet Mohammed PBUH used to himself help around the house and his wife Khatida was herself a businesswoman.

Thanks for stopping by.

Unknown said...

gul- hi shagufta, just happened to stumble over your blog today.
i liked it. i have been in that space where you are and i can totally understand your angst and where its coming from.
i think in a typical indian house hold we need a revolution, but you know there is one thing i sense in your articles which i feel is wrong.( pls dont mind)

its like during the communal riots the hindus keep saying the muslims are killing and all the muslims keep saying that the hindus are killing, as if its black and white.
not all muslims are fundamentalists and not all hindus bad.

good and bad people can never be identified due to their region or religion.

some people are good and some are bad.. they can be from anywhere and of any religion.

i have spent years thinking about women repression in our culture. i use to blame it on men.

but honestly if there's anybody to be blamed then its WOMEN THEMSELVES!!

the mother's, the sisters and the wives!!
the mother's treat their sons like they are the prince of johannesburg!!
khana kaise banyega, kapde kaise dhoyege bechara, shaadi kar do iski!!

i have seen my cousin, she and her youger brother would be back from school and she would go and get cold water for him. thats what the mother taught her, and thats what they will expect his wife to do!
the wife- inko to servant ke hath ki roti pasand nahin hai! yeh to sirf mere haath ki roti khate hai!
my foot!! do din nahi khayenge, teesre din se sab rotiyan acchi lagne lagegi!!

but for that women have to change! not men! believe me!
men are what they are brought up to be by their mothers! we imbibe what we learn in our childhood!

if in the name of love we have seen our mothers slaving around our fathers thats what we will expect from life when we grow up!

if a mother shouts at a son and asks him to go and heat his own food, he will learn to do that!

but women are mysterious creatures submerged in their own bizarre insecurities!!

women will be slaves till the time they themselves, decide they should put an end to this..

this culture which defines love in the most absurd way:

oh please my dear, leave your family, leave your friends, forget your city, come to my city, take care of my parents, forget about yours, cook for me and quit your job, stop thinking of your body and keep having babies till you give me a son..
and of-course don't forget to lose your name..



WHY??
OH DIDNT YOU GET IT BABY!! I LOVE YOU !!

U HAVE JUST BEEN ERASED!!!!

Shagufta said...

Oh my God ! You seem to have oured out your heart here! Wonderful piece! Clap clap!
Thankfully, I've not been prejudiced against. I hardly get to cook as I work. But Mom does struggle with household chores. I hope I do not marry a man who will treat me like a servant!